I hadn’t realised how long I have been neglecting this space, but there are just so much mindless things to do that I haven’t even got the time to start on my books yet.

Kinda feels like a dead town here.

Will try to spice up this space… say, uhm, tomorrow, when I finally can sort out some of the house maintenance works.

Things have been alright, peaceful, and the direction is clearer, with the blatant signs raying in.

And quite excited about hosting some new friends who are gracing our shores next week.

*Beams*

What is there to do in Singapore, really? Seems like I jam pack quite a bit of stuff in my recommendations, and I probably will be seeing them for just a couple of days during their pretty long stay (relative to land area, laughs) here.

I am looking forward to the food to come, and probably, though unlikely, the Texas Hold’em sessions to come.

In other news, I lost 200k worth of chips at the Texas Hold’em table.

Only consolation is, I didn’t lose as much on the cruise, and that it is just on Facebook.

Now you know why I am not here.

Tsk!

And….

.. Tonight is a night I wonder badly where you are, and how you are. I wish I know what really happened.. and that some day, to see you again.

***

Finally met up with Siren after the busy girl finally had time to meet up/talk to me on Tuesday night after we had a heartland session in Kovan’s Hong Kong cafe and doused her in a great deal of cruise stories, and my tampon sagas.

It was just for an hour of meet up after dinner with Minibean and a cosy evening in of home cooked food, to return to give Minibean a goodnight kiss and hug, which lingered and became a long session of snuggling, cuddling and patting. I am not sure what’s with the emotions, but in the dimmed room, when she burrowed into my embrace, I felt such an urge to cry when she rattled on with her baby talk.

Where had my baby gone? I am just so proud of her.

Warm and fuzzy.

***

I wonder how I managed salsa today after missing the crux of it after 2 weeks of absence, and that’s why I seriously didn’t manage well. But I had a good laugh with the chaps in my class (HAHAHAHAHA!).

Not with the muscle aches too (finally graduated from my 1st pole dance class on Monday! Advancing on!).

Felt some kind of loneliness today that can’t be expressed. And as always it was compensated by endless rattlings of mindless stuff, but when you need to dig for the depth of it, nothing quite came out.

Maybe it was the talk my beautician had with me.

Maybe it was just trying to search for news of a friend but his determination of leaving no trace.. was too hard to fight.

Maybe it was just.. looking helplessly on from the sidelines, and then not wanting to entangle in the midst, but perhaps I had.

Maybe there was a slight guilt, I wouldn’t call it betrayal, but then somehow when caught between truth, and accountability.. I find myself not able to lie even though it could be have been the better option.

Maybe it was just low morale, though there isn’t any need to.

I know I sound quite excited *points* up there for the new things to come, the fact is I am quite thrilled, yet at the same time, I am quite apprehensive.

Sitting by the harbour side after dinner at Vivocity, was quite some quiet, chilling time.

And we mentioned about weddings, and despite the thick cynicism, I find it quite sad that I actually… still believe in fairytales, just not for myself lah, but for others, and that’s why I always got so excited for those couples I am just so happy to see getting hitched.

Then the email from overseas guests came in, and then suddenly I could think of so many things to do in Singapore. Ubin? Blading? Batam? Bodyworlds? On top of the other things we had discussed haha.

And of course, we spoke of the beauty of winter…

I wanna see aurora.

.. and I thought of the article on Oulanka I read on NatGeo, and the beauty of the wilderness. Mysterious. Intriguing.

Very the high and orgasmistic now!

Eh, suddenly feels better already!