I went to the pantry to grab a drink after talking with partners for a good half day, and stared out into the distant, out of the window.

Wait a minute, what distant?

I couldn’t decide if it was raining… or.. oh, ahh.. it was just, misty.

Ya, ya, I know it is HAZY, not misty, but hey, don’t argue with the romantic in the very hormonal lady, thank you very much.

Then, yearning for something smooth and soothing, I youtube-d for this, and while I breathed in the chilled, cleaner air in the office, the mist haze actually convince me enough that I am anywhere but here.

What a contrast, where I was standing under the scorching sun, hailing a cab at NUS, and dozing off from the fatigue I couldn’t quite fight, nor overcome anymore.

I NEEEEEEEEEEEEDDDDDDDDD MY SPAAAACCCEEEEEEEEEE.

Wouldn’t it be nice to just leave everything behind and run, walk, stroll, crawl, or whatever at my own varied pace.

I canceled all lessons/sessions/meet ups this week, but still, I didn’t get home till 2ish for past 2 nights.

Was at NUS today and saw a series of Contiki catalogue and it is time to put actions to words.

***

Random: Was reading news about how 20% of teenagers losing their virginity at the grand, old, age of 16 (I said I was chaste and innocent, didn’t I?). Then I shuddered at the thought that the figures might well be increasing in another 13 years’ time.

If I have a son, I might just give him a pat on the back for a job well done (no, seriously, I don’t mean that), but those who have daughters will understand, hor?

***

Last night I was jolted awake and my heart raced when the storm approached out of nowhere, and created a ruckus in the middle of the night.

I remember I whimpered and then thought I was dreaming. I kinda chided myself when the 2nd roar came up to prove I wasn’t dreaming.

I think my defensiveness got mellowed last night when I was sleeping or something, I thought I am even too tired to feel scared, but apparently I was wrong.

I blame it on the hormones making me a scaredy, defenseless, whimpering wimp.

I don’t have much excuses for other times now, do I?

***

Woken up to a plenty of fuss this morning.

The new big-screen LCD TV was fixed up (Yay!) and sofa set (cos it’s free, from my dad’s friend, I shall not complain about how hard and uncomfortable antique chairs are) arrived to replace the almost 15 years-old one.

Suddenly, I can’t wait to achieve what I set out to achieve by the end of the year, so that I can finally get a place of my own.

With only 3-figure in my bank account in early 2008 (yes, I only have ONE account and not those secret savings/spending accounts people have), I know it is almost impossible to get 6-figured savings by this year end.

Still, I can try, right? There’s always roulette or something. Giggles.

Kidding!

With the frivoulous spending this year (trust me, it WAS CRAZY! Considering I don’t think I spend much, I don’t know where all the money go to), it would take some kind of miracle for me to get 1/4, or should God be really gracious and Singapore Pools to be absolutely generous, 1/2 way (I am not greedy!) or 3/4 way there.

I think it is this eagerness to try out everything and get myself out of this predicament that these days I am busy searching, trying, and many of such need mooooolah to sustain.

How to get a house like this?!

And of course… the topic of childcare and schooling for Minibean.

I shall build something.

But build something need moolah also.

Chicken and egg theory all over again.

Ohhhhh wellllll.

I wanna reverse the fact of my 2 left feet

***

Someone and I were chatting about the eerie coincidences… and strangely I just said how I don’t believe in coincidences anymore. Heh.

The world is far too fucking small for comfort.

***

I am feeling a lil dreamy today, and it feels kinda safe, kinda nice