I have been lamenting about my spending this month, which saw me squandering away my entire paycheck even before half of the month breezed by.
Old bills, dusty debts and the sneaky credit card bills took me by surprise.
Ever put your life on hold for so long and when the time comes for you to sort out everything again, you realise how much there really is to be done, and then everything has to start from the beginning?
My kitchen has been falling apart since years ago after almost 15 years. The bathtub in my parents’ room has to go to convert into a shower because my dad is getting old… The couch I have been wanting to change.. The CRT TVs which are cranking up but still workable… the toilet seat that has been pinching my butt cheeks ever so often… the passport picture on Minibean which no longer looks like her botak newborn style. The long delayed trip to the dentist… where I have to do polishing/scaling/mending of the chip in my teeth (playing hide and seek with Dad that fateful night still makes him laughing to the memory)/filling of cavities all at the same time.
And of course, a much needed trip to the physio-therapist soon. And what’s with all the stored up pictures uploaded but never posted?
Change this, change that, remove this, remove that, add this, add that.. repay this.. repay that. Rush this.. rush that.. plan this.. plan that.
And then you realise everything seems endless.
Was talking to a friend I hadn’t met for the longest time over lunch that when I had not much and was utterly broke, everything seems enough, or sometimes, even more than enough. But when you are earning more, you think of rewarding yourself, you think of buying the things you always wanted to have but couldn’t bear to splurge on… and then proportionately, you are actually poorer than before.
It was like, the television I bought during sale. After that, I look at the huge screen and I thought of buying DVDs to utilise it, then I remember how it is more expensive than watching the show in the cinema and I become the kiam siap prudent auntie again.
The same theories of how girls will wanna get that pair of heels in the shop window to go with certain bags/dresses.
And then, I find myself struggling because when tired, I always think I have an extra $20 somewhere to take a cab.. when last time the temptation could be easier fought.
How $2 lunches were enough, but dinners at hotels/the chic chic places with rave reviews became more frequent as I caved to my cravings.
But there are things I wouldn’t change. The chance to save up for the next long-haul trip… to see the world out there. Get my back better so I could tahan a tank on my back. Hmm time to get a back brace and slap on the deep heat.
In a couple of weeks, I will be heading off to Vietnam, and to see Hanoi.
I have never been to sightseeing in the region, and it will be a good place to start with Ha Long Bay. Dipping in the sea!
Ironically, I will be in Hanoi longer than any of my recent trips. 6 days 5 nights, compared to my 4 days in Rome, 2 and half days in Moscow, and I wasn’t even in London for 6 straight days. Doesn’t quite make sense to me, but it does when 4 of those days I would be enclosed in the hotel…
And the thing is…? I wanna save up for something else to use on the trip. Seeeee… what did I say about endless things?
Speaking about work, I felt something flapping on my back earlier today and I tried to brush it off. Then I felt it flapping in my hair.
With my bad experiences with flying cockroaches(especially one that flew into my face, and I thought it was a moth…), I actually wheeled myself over to my ang moh colleague (who unfortunately was the only person nearby) and grabbed him as I let out a yelped.
I think I scared him more than the moth scared me. He sneered at me for being a scaredy cat.
Someone said it was a butterfly and I shamelessly said cos I dressed like a red rose today(shuddap Potty, Rafflesia your potty!). Cough.
Speaking about something random, I once said I will not have sharks’ fins on the menu should I ever tie the knot, and I am still looking for a man who will agree to that after I felt absoluted guilty (I dreamed about sharks during my nap) when I ate some during lunch today.
I was told some people do get sharks’ fins the humane way, but I started wondering with images flashing through my mind… how do I know the one in my plate was the humane way?
Anyway.
The lady at the Malaysia Embassy is such an angel! When I rushed in to get my passport, she remembered me and asked a very flustered me if I had just went shopping(cos I was holding on to some of my company’s products). She made small talks and she had a fabulous smile.
Friendly and smiling! She made my day, just like that. I collected Minibean’s passport almost immediately.
And I bumped into the Dad of the little Piscean boy whom we met earlier. Did I mention they too, forgot to bring their Malaysia Identity Cards because it wasn’t listed on the list?
Damn.
After my nap. I am awake now. How?
