ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR!

You know, sometimes I believe I could make do with much lesser drama in my life.

But naaaahh-uh! -wags finger divaliciously- My life is just so not destined to be so.

I mean, like, fucking seriously! I am like, fucking bemused, and then, amused.

It was so bizarre that I was laughing after the realisation hit me.

And you thought a dinner with the family before they head back to Malaysia which ended with a work call coming in is hardly exciting.

***

Dad dropped me off at the lobby after dinner, and a work call came in.

Since I didn’t want to get cut off, I walked into the letter-box area where the notice board was at, and then I remembered that I lost my bunch of keys just days before and I didn’t have the key with me.

And then I remembered Dad had brought the mails up earlier today. And yes, my realisation hit me late these days.

I stared at the board for updates, and then one of the notes distracted me.

“What an idiotic man! You are! Evil! Black-hearted! Ridiculous! Black-hearted! No compassion!”

Woohoo! A fight amongst the neighbours? I didn’t quite understand what was going on and with questions being thrown to me over the phone, I was hardly thinking.

But I vaguely remembering my blogging instinct to take a picture of this so I could later blog about how people these days are arguing via notes, and how interesting it is, even though I have abso-fucking-lutely no idea what was going on.

Apparently, there was another note, which prompted such a reply from another resident.

As more questions were thrown to me over the phone, I started to roam my eyes over to the other note, which apparently spoke of a Chinese lady blarblarblar…

I thought it was a petty note and freaking hilarious, and as I was concentrating hard on the call, I made a mental note that maybe I should just take a picture of it just to blog about it.

Then, came 2 secondary school girls, and the notes got them talking. One of them got worked up and expressed how much she wanted to remove the 2 notes cos they were just being totally silly. I silently wished they didn’t so I could take a picture of it to post on my blog.
I went over to re-read the note again when they left.

MON 21.01.08 6.25PM

I WAS ENTERING, SHE WAS EXITING(A CHINESE WOMAN CRADLING AN INFANT).

INSTEAD OF CLOSING THE DOOR BEHIND ME, I HELD OPEN THE DOOR AND WAITED FOR HER.

WITHOUT A WORD OF APPRECIATION, SHE WALKED PAST ME TO THE DARK-COLOURED WAITING HONDA.

F–CKING BITCH. I HOPE YOU DROP YOUR INFANT!!

Tsk tsk. So evil.

Then as more questions were posted to me over the call, I started thinking how I would react if I were the Chinese lady in the note. I had associated the lady to… you know, from China, and was perhaps targeted unfairly.

I was gladly pleased that I have always thanked the people who held doors open for me, and then… kinda relieved to remember Dad drives a light-coloured Honda.

Then, something didn’t feel quite right.

I took a picture of the note with my phone and ended the work call.

I thought I would take a picture of the note with my camera and then I scrolled through my camera…….

And I saw this picture.

See the date? See the time? See the…. place?

OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD!

My parents were heading out with Minibean, and I was heading out for dinner/mahjong with the guys.

And then I remembered!

Uncle Keith drives a dark-coloured Honda and picked me up that day before we rushed to pick FF up!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am the Fucking Bitch!

And it is MY BABY, MINIBEAN, THE ABSOLUTE CUTENESS THAT CAME FROM BETWEEN MY LEGS WHO WAS CURSED IN THE NOTE!

And I remembered the guy who stood there for the longest time and I nodded and smiled at him. I even remember how he looks like.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And I was so slow to realise it was me. I re-read it at least 5 times before I associated the person to be, yours truly. Giggles, I am so silly.

Of course, I was offended. I would not tolerate anyone who target my baby in such a manner, but I was laughing at the hilarity of it, that, I was finding it fucking ridiculous.

And so, I wrote a note.

And I placed it just next to it, and hoping it wouldn’t be removed by the management.

Giggles. I was so polite! I was so sweet! I even signed off as Yours Sincerely, the Fucking Bitch.

*Edited:

Oh, here is what I wrote:

To: The gracious bespectacled gentleman who held the door for me & my precious(yes, I am appreciative enough to remember how you look like)

I would like to express my heartfelt thanks to you for your kind and considerate gesture on a busy Monday evening.

I would have missed this note completely if I didn’t stop to answer a work call on this day. And I was reading the note, bemused, thinking it was someone else. I thought it would be interesting to share the juicy content and took a picture of it.

I re-read it 5 times, and scrolled through my camera, before I realised… HEY! I’ve a picture taken with my baby at 6.25pm on 21st Jan 08 at the gate! And then, HEY! I remember! My friend was waiting for me in a dark-coloured Honda! And then OH NO! I realised. Gasp! It’s me!

And then. YES! I remembered! I’m sorry my nod & appreciative smile went unnoticed, and I didn’t say a loud enough Thank You cos I was busy apologising to my waiting friend, and introducing my mum(who was leaving too) to my friend. That was so ill-mannered of me, my bad! I will remember to shout a THANK YOU next time, just so my innocent and dear baby will not be subjected to such rude and evil and petty -please insert all other polite-sounding words here- curse in the future.

Have a nice day, and thanks for amusing me. No thanks for what you said about my baby though. And sorry to disappoint you, she’s well and safe.

Yours Sincerely, The Fucking Bitch

Meeeeoooooowwww!

And I thought I would just blog about someone else’s stupidity before I realise, the joke is on me too.

I hope it wouldn’t become some sort of those mega neighbours-fight that we so often read(Like Daisy said, “I am looking forward to read your story in the tabloids. Ha. Ha. Not funny).

But man, this man made my Monday evening.

And what took me so long to realise the note was there?

And gee, I am surprised no one removed it, and I am glad I got to read it.

Now now, I remember why he stared so hard and long on that day.

And since it is my Day 1 of extreme bleeding(Thank God! My endless bingeing will finally stop!), the hormones need to be soaked up by more than a whisper pad.