I felt this heaviness in my heart when I woke up today.

I had a dream, and in the dream, Dad was weak and immobile, and it was just so heartbreaking that after fighting so many things for all these years, there is no way he, nor anyone, could beat age.

You know how such dream will make you wake up and feel like crap, because the thought of them aging, or leaving you is just so overwhelming and heartbreaking?

In the same dream, he was insisting to carry Minibean despite his condition, and I do not know how or why, the dream took an interesting turn when Minibean started to stand up and walk, and I exclaimed, ‘My God! She’s only 6 and half months!’ in extreme shock, and was trying to look for the camera.

Just then, a phone call from Dad came in(in reality!) and woke me up from the strange dream.

Of course, I had stranger dreams than that, but it is just some dreams would leave you with more lingering feeling than others.

Dad has been walking with a slight limp these days, and I tend to look away because it will fill my heart with so much sadness.

***

I spent yesterday working from home, and finally giving some attention to my financial field. Despite that, much of the time was co-ordinating the part-timers and setting the last-minute contingency plan into action for the zoo event tomorrow(-gasp-).

Time in front of the computer makes you realise that a whole new era would have came and passed, and you would have no idea.

And the definition of information lag without being online holds a brand new meaning when news only get to you like, hello? 4 days late!!!!

But *giggles giggles* it was all worthwhile. Explosive enough!

***

I met up with a client to close an insurance case last night too, and what surprised me was when I said, “I have been breathing and surviving on McDee’s for the last week!”

He laughed and said incredulously, “Really? It’s either you are really craving for it, or that you are really broke!”

It caught me by surprise, before I could only say matter-of-factly, “Haha! Really? On the contrary, McDee’s is a luxury for me, you know? On bad days, I would curb the urge and just walk a little further to have the $1.90 Nasi Lemak at the hawker centre or just not eat!”

Quite honestly, I know this is bad for me to say, but I did go hungry or just survive on one meal when I was pregnant(before parents found out). And it was during then, I took cab rides much lesser than I did these days. Laughs.

I guess life, is different, like such.

I spent late last night watching Music and Lyrics on uhm… my computer. I didn’t do what FF did(cough cough).

I enjoyed the show, it was darn funny seeing Hugh Grant, and it finally took a load off my week, before the real shit comes, in half an hour’s time, when I have to scoot off the house to get everything done, and then consider the possibility of bringing Minibean back tomorrow morning with Roy babysitting her while I work, at 7am in the morning.

So, anymore good movies to recommend me? Just throw in any idea since I didn’t catch any movies for the past one year, I believe any good movies you recommend wouldn’t be on my ‘watched’ list.

Time to drag my ass out of bed.