I have to work hard for her.I told myself that, and set myself a target to hit. It’s almost an absurd figure, but I have to do it.
I don’t want to leave her behind. I don’t want her to be elsewhere.
It was a terrible night as I try to cope with the sense of loss.
My mum’s joy was my annoyance.
I am worried about Minibean, really.
As much as I tried to sniff back those tears, my resistance was futile.
I sobbed in the dark as she tried to communicate with me, as if giving me comfort, with her gurgles.
The flu was a great cover up.
I refused to cry in front of my parents. I have always refused to. And this time, no way am I giving in either.
I got terribly annoyed this morning when I fed her and I refused to put her down, Mum said, ‘Don’t carry her! Wait she wakes up.’
Hello? I her mother you know?
Argh. I am just grouchy.
My boss’ + SBB + FF + Colleague’s SMSes were supposed to make me feel better, but they just crumbled me.
The house feels so cold and unfeeling as I stepped into it this morning.
Waking up at 6am to head out to Singapore, work, back to JB at 9pm is another option right before me.
And it is seriously tempting.
Or perhaps, work hard enough for me to afford an in-house nanny.
*hugs*…..
I almost cried when I read this post…I can imagine the pain you feel. I cannot do it, really.
Yes, do work harder and when you can afford a more financially stable life, bring her home. You can consider a live-in maid next time….it costs $500 a mth inclusive of maid’s salary and levy. It may be a heavy committment now but is definitely a good option to consider when you think you are ready.
Jiayou okie?
*hug*
*hugz*…
jia youz dear…
Sharlene
Take care dear.
*hugs*
jia you!!*hugz
Hi, it’s a very difficult decision for u. May I ask if the reason is financial constraint or because of your working hours? Some nannies are willing to handover later at night, or even take care of baby overnight/ or some nights. $400-$700, I’ve been told.