WOAH.
I am simply amused by how missiles of words are flying all round.
I had told myself to tie my hands to the chair not to refuke anything, cos there’s simply nothing else for me to say.
I got uncomfortable when I saw people talking to me about ‘this side, or that side.‘
So, this whole thing is getting territorial? *scratch heads*
Everyone told me to ignore, but more names are snowballed into the whole shite that’s going on. They don’t deserve that.
Why huh? Why did it have to escalate to such?
Yet, just 2 more things, and that’s it, from me.
One, I DID NOT use ‘Come on la, you all really believe….’ as my introduction to the question that sparked the entire saga.
The words were animated. ‘Eh, ask you all ah….. you all really believe…’
There is a difference, and could be a significant one.
I believe it was took out of context to spice up the sensational factor.
When 2 persons spoke up, yeah, I was shocked. More shock factor from why the strong over-reaction to a casual question.
It was only when I was home, when one of them MSN me to drive the point to me, then did I think to myself, ‘Eh, I still thought it was over and done with at that point of time, why still harping on it?’.
Then, a minor suspicion of people might have read too much into it crept in, but I brushed it off and didn’t think it would be.
Two. My good friend and I had not spoke much about the bloggers when we are out at Balaclava, and she was not sure of my take of the said person.
She told the said person when was asked why does she think I dislike her, good friend just gave an answer saying ‘I don’t know. Probably because….‘
There. They took it as a confirmation which they need for the case.
Why get everyone involve into it when we don’t want to.
Ask me. Directly. We all know how passing-the-message game always screw things up.
So. Truth is, I do have my reservations about her. I did.
But does reservations equate to dislike? I don’t think so.
I had reservations about Finicky Feline too, when she shot me a cold stare when we first met.
The reservations were there, for quite a while. I spent that night asking people I was close to, whether if she didn’t like me or something.
Until she added me on MSN, and I opened up to her.
I have reservations about Joel too. I still do. That’s because I still don’t know her, but I just might have a chance to, in the future.
Even Jordangoh, Tripleperiod. Are they nice, or are they just, being diplomatic?
I don’t know.
Now, dislike is still too strong a word. But being misquoted does irk me. Being having friends I love and adore pulled into the whole whirlpool makes me feel… affected.
Someone told me to show I am affected might just be what people want.
But truth is, I am, and I can’t hide it.
Truth is, the reservations grew more. I am apprehensive, feel the need to be cautious, and sceptical around a couple of people. The gap just grew bigger. Negativities increase, and it’s just harder to read the people cos everything is clouded.
Or is there a need to?
Is it a cruel episode of mind game? A misunderstanding which could be easily solved, and was fuelled by people with Godknowswhat intention?
I’m curious.
Why is it everyone trying to establish the question is of harmful nature and wrap in hostility?
Why is it that nobody is asking in return HOW did the malicious statement of ‘Ting was throwing herself all over Tetanus over supper, flirting incessantly‘ came about?
Who ignited that?
Over supper, there was only that few of us, or them.
Most present would be able to vouch it was almost ridiculous cos I did not do anything potentially that would remotely suggest that.
If you think I am directing it at the said person, no, I am not. I do not think it was even her. I am genuinely curious with how this came about.
Then what about Mambo night when everyone was all over everyone, in the name of fun, dirty dancing, and nobody said anything?
The intention behind the character assasination proves to be a tad sinister, isn’t it?
What is the agenda behind? I don’t know. Perhaps, it’s better that I don’t.
It was a rumour out of NOTHING.
Maybe it was a joke that was blown out of proportion.
Maybe not.
Why would someone want to do that?
Speculation wouldn’t quite explain that, cos it would be a suspicion, not a solid statement that suggest otherwise.
Teasing wouldn’t be substantial cos I would be at the receiving end, and not going behind my back.
Politics? Conceivably.
Any other reasons?
And, why me?
No, I am not trying to gain sympathy here. I don’t need any.
I don’t want and don’t need anyone to jump in front of me to shield me.
All I take comfort is, at the end of everything, people will silently think to themselves, ‘I know her.’ with that confidence in me.
Even if you’re not my friend.
That was only my 2nd meeting with them. I am awed.
Mind-boggling, isn’t it?
So why nobody is trying to get to the bottom of this when this is a clear indication that the whole thing is getting personal?
I don’t know.
Who are the hypocrites here?
I don’t like mind games.
Take me out.
Great. I shouldn’t blog about all these to feel naked and exposed right?
But yeah, you got me affected, if that’s what whoever you are want to know.
Whoever you are, whatever your intention is, may I know:
What for?
Die. Meeting 2 gorgeous people for dinner and I am still blogging at 6.24pm.
Hey there…
I just played the quiz posted up by Kenny and I found out I have similarities with you! I like the way you write… Keep it up.
Ciaozz…
One thing I can tell you is this, you meet people who love writing about everything that happens to them and everyone else.. and you think that rumors would not start about things that are not true.
Bloggers like to Blog.. and they can find material anywhere. I think blogging is great, but you can understand that if something is “blogworthy” you will be in the middle of it.
I am fully understanding your fustration! Keep your chin up!!!
Hugs!!!
Would knowing the bad hat in this case really change you in anyway? And if you do know who the bad hat is, what’s your next cause of action? Being emotional isn’t always a good thing. Sss…:I
annabella: Hey babe, thanks for the compliments, so I expect to see you hanging around here more often in the future?
snake: I guess you don’t really get my point. Finding out is not the main priority. This entry is just more about the thoughts about in this not so nice situation, and how it develops to something daunting.
The answers to ur questions are not my priorities, and not something i feel is important.
I dun see how being emotional isnt a good thing and the whole episode is linked together. to feel is a natural reaction, no?
clearing things up, thats all.
I blog details, which I had always do, and I blog emotions. so i dun see anything wrong with baring my feelings and thoughts.
california italian: in the same breath, i cant quite make out your comments much either haha.. the situation wasn’t being blogged, but was passed on verbally.
Hmm! Being emotional isn’t wrong, it just isn’t always a good thing. Sss…:I
Wah rau! Blogging at 6:24pm?!? No wonder! Haha….
I’m a very Simply Bo Chup kind of guy, so I don’t usually don’t think to much about politics… but when they bug me too much I just go bury the guilty ones six feet under, keke…
Cold stare? Sniff. I was trying to tell you thru ESP how glad I was to meet you. bleh.
snake: thats the way I have always been
hisreason: Wooooooooops. kena busted.
AAi yooo.. simply bo chup and bury them six feet under. I just bury myself six feet under
ff: That time the antenna and frequency never tune properly. Now i know
wah liao, simple blog outing caused so much … ‘discomfort’. did i use the right word?
then what will happen at the upcoming sgbloggers convention?
i too just met a fellow blogger on monday. i have to admit it was kinda … awkward at first. now it’s better : )
it takes time to know someone. just like when you go to a new school for the first day and you know nobody.
I know u are looking for a closure.
The life span of rumours is pretty short. Once the story lack of steam everything will be back to square one.Its the matter of time.
Dont worry lah~cheers~only time will tell.
Yupe… I’ll defintely be here a lot. Hehe… Your anonimity really intrigues me. I’ve been thinking of shutting down my site and making myself an anonymous one… I get how you feel. Sometimes things like that just happens…
Don’t have to be bothered by what others said ba.. no use de.. their mouth just can’t shut smetimes.. lolx
Am I lucky that I didn’t go there, then?
amithyst: I guess its just easy to have misunderstandings in a crowd, miscommunications, I guess.
And its just normal for you to stick to people you’re more acquainted with in the beginning.
Hehe, hence I guess I would give the convention a miss. Shy la.
kelly: Thanks
A closure, I had. So, it was all good.
annabella: I am not totally anonymous, in fact, I think I disclose a pretty lot on my blog. Jus that my picture is still not totally disclosed for insecurities sake. hehe.
garnet:
Ren yan ke wei at times. hehe.
suspiciousbastard: i guess so then.
Very often, fun events sometimes become unhappy events, especially with the alcohol and all, people let down their guards and their common sense which will lead to some pretty malicious things.
This is such with all human interaction, and yes, people can be dangerous. Whatever you do, don’t kill yourself over some comments/rumours/bitching ya?
I have had my fair share of IRC meetups and friendships which went awfully wrong… People come and go. Just watch.
In the meantime, chill ya?
People can be dangerous. How true. I just didn’t realise it is more often than not.
I have learnt a great deal from this whole ‘ordeal’. Perhaps, a tad too fast a pace since it’s a very fresh attempt for me to get involve in social gatherings.
But, I am amazed at the quality of friends I picked up along the way… and I think it made me stronger in some ways, and still not lose that much faith in people.
People come and go.
I am one of those who wish people could just stay.
I’ve had such thinking sometime ago. I wished people would stay too. And stay for good. But unfortunately, sometimes people don’t even know they are worth forgetting and worth loathing.
*pat pat*
I guess there’s no refraining people from perceiving and judging you by your blog personality. occupational hazards of being a quasi-celebrity blogger. naturally, that label is a magnet for gossip.
this may sound cynical, but not all bloggers are ‘nice’. some have agendas. some play the game. of course, you do meet the genuinely sincere. that should count for something, no? I’m sure there are loads more people rooting for ya.
be brave.
barffie: Oh yeah. Those bugs. Life is such. those you wish who would stay, seldom. and some, would just overstay their welcome.
Gr.
bravewimp: *Purrrr*
Sometimes its not even the blog personality. I am not sure if they even read me in the first place. and they are even more known bloggers than i am.
I don’t know, really.
your 2nd paragraph summarise this experience.